5 — Day 1 - Part II - Jewish LSD Freak Meets Jesus Freak

So, here I was having the "trip" of my life--a bad trip to boot!  I had never experienced anything like this.  I had suddenly achieved spiritual enlightment (so I thought).  I had become conscious of my own self "godness" and oneness with the comic whole.  And, in this state of hallucinatory confusion, I believed that, having discovered my godness, the looming thunderstorm and sky full of dark clouds meant that I had decided to end the world.

Secluded as I sat in the bushes on the steps leading down to the lake, I felt a tap on my shoulder. I turned around to see a tall, thin young man with blond hair.  He looked at me with his deep blues eyes and asked if I was okay.  To this day, I still can't figure out how he found me there. Maybe he had seen me wander down to the lake.  Maybe his older brother, Chris the Hippie had alerted him to my predicament, or maybe someone how the real God sent him my way.  

I turned to this innocent looking young man whom I would come to know as "Dave" and said:

I am okay.  I am God and it is the end of the world.

Dave replied:

You aren't God , and it isn't the end of the world--yet.

And then he began to tell me that there was a time coming when the world would end, but that I could come to know the true God personally and avoid that disastrous end.

You guessed it--Dave was what he called a "Jesus Freak."  For the next several hours, Dave along with his brother, Chris the Hippie, began to try to convince me that what I needed was a "personal relationship with Jesus."  Now, that type of stuff wouldn't go over with me as a Jew, even the nominal Jew that I was, if I were sober.  But, under the influence of a very strong hallucinogen, my natural resistance to strange ideas was weak.  So, instead of laughing at this kid Dave and dismissing him as just another Christian like all the others I had known, I tried to make sense of what he was saying.  Of course, I wasn't making much sense at the moment, so I don't think I was ready for a debate.

By now, the thunderstorm had broken and Dave and I were soaked to the skin.  He offered to give me shelter at his apartment--the one where I parked my Mustang.  I gladly took him up on the offer.  As I sat on his floor with my back resting on his wall, I began to drip dry and the LSD began to lessen its intensity.  I was in my 5th hour of the trip and was beginning to "come down." When he determined that his verbal arguments didn't seem to be persuading me, Dave handed me his Bible and asked me to read Isaiah 53 and Psalm 22.  These are two primary proof texts used Christians to proselytize Jews.  Of course, the words on the page were just a blur to me.

Here Comes the Freaky Part

As the sun began to set, it became too dark in the room to read, and typical of college students, they either didn't have any lights in the room that worked, or kept the lights off to avoid high utility bills.  

As I sat in the dark room, a spec of light about the size of a penlight appeared on the opposite wall.  As I stared at it, it became brighter and larger.  It seemed to be slowly coming toward me. Timothy Leary had written about the "clear white light of the void" that was experienced as one approached "enlightenment."  My anticipation rose as it drew closer to me.  Leary had warned that merging with the clear white light required concentration.  You should neither resist it or turn away.  You should focus on it.  He said that often a sense of dread might come over you and that you needed to keep yourself open to it as it approached, rejecting any fear.

As it got to what seemed to be about 5 feet from me, I was suddenly overcome with a strong sense that the light itself was sinister.  I turned my head slightly to the side and the light instantly disappeared.

The light's departure was followed by the sun breaking through the retreating storm clouds outside the window, lighting the room.

I must have made a noise or cried out at that moment.  Dave got up and crossed the room to where I was curled up--knees to nose.  He once again asked me if I was alright.  I told him what I had just experienced.  He smiled sympathetically and once again launched into a religious explanation.  He told me:

Satan often masquerades as an angel of light.  That was the devil trying to enter you.  But Chris and I have been praying for you and that is what protected you.

Oy!  This was just too much for me in one day--all this Jesus and devil stuff!  I stood and thanked them for helping me in out of the rain.  They tried to give me a Bible to take with me, but I refused.  As I left their apartment and headed across my frat house, I had no idea that by week's end that we would be all be stuffed in my Mustang (Chris, Dave, and Barry my tripping partner) as we headed for a Jesus Commune in Santa Cruz.

This was only the first of my seven days in May.