6 — [A Word of Caution from a Wondering Wanderer]

A word of caution here before we progress.  I have been putting off writing this part of the story for the last 10 years.  The reason for this is that 10 years ago I walked away from a 30 year focus.

I have been hesitant to tell this story because I am sure that it will cause offense to many.  I was concerned that it could even have a negative impact on my family's relationships and especially my daughter as she navigated her teen years.  

But I am working on my 60th year and my wife and I have been on this journey together for 33 years.  My daughter is an adult with her own son to raise.  Both my wife and daughter have been encouraging me to get this into print for some time now.  And, if I don't tell this story, no one else will be able to explain it to my grandson!  

This is a pretty wild story that will take us from my childhood in the USA, to Africa, southeast Asia, Israel, and back. It includes my time as a soldier in an African army and my return to work side-by-side with my former enemies.  It is a pretty wild ride, but that is not what caused me to hesitate.

The Cause of Hesitation

The next few installments in this saga detail a course change that would cause me to "wander" for three decades.  Because I wondered as I wandered, I would end up completely overturning the life choices I made during my 7 days in May.  

This is not to say that 30 years were a total bust, but my conscious motivation for the entire period would be overthrown.  Because I always wondered as I wandered, I would eventually find an underlying motivation that would lead me to reject my conscious motivation.

Now does this seem confusing to you?  Let me make this plain.  Over the course of 7 days in May, I would wander away from my Jewish faith.  I had already rejected my Jewish upbringing as being inadequate.  

Now I began to take a course that was definitely not Jewish.  I would begin to become interested in Jesus--although this was a much different Jesus than the one in traditional Christianity.  I would start as a "Jesus Freak" on the outside of organized "churchianity", but eventually would find myself as a pastor, missionary, and even a seminary professor right smack in the middle of a well-established Christian denomination.  But, because I wondered and because I was always questioning everything (one element of my Jewish heritage that never abated), I was always in trouble with some religious "authority."  The more trouble I got in, the more I wondered.  At the end of 30 years progressing deeper and deeper into Christian religion, I walked away from it and returned to my Jewish faith.

So, in the next few segments I will detail how I wandered into Christianity.  Later we will document how I wondered my way back to Judaism.

My story will relate the challenges I faced, both theologically and experientially.  If you stick with me as I narrate this journey, you will probably be challenged too.  Whether you are Jewish or gentile, religious or irreligious, a faith adherent or an agnostic--you are likely to be frustrated with me.  But if I am to tell my story, I have to be open with you.  I hope you can remain open with me as you read.